Domestic Abuse!!!

Domestic Abuse

This is what we experience daily. It's a norm to see partners being abused in several ways which can turn out worse. Some people do not see a problem with domestic abuse because they feel it's normal to discipline their partners which they have no idea that is very wrong most especially if it affects them physically. Domestic abuse can be triggered by so many factors. Some are driven to act unjustly just because they can't control themselves. While some actually act unjustly because they derive pleasure when their partner or family member are in pain. That sounds weird you know, but really there are a lot of sick people out there.


We tend to think of Domestic Abuse as physical violence or assault on a partner. In reality, however, domestic abuse is the summary of physically, sexually and psychologically abusive behaviors directed by one partner against another, regardless of their marital status or gender. Domestic Abuse does not just affect people of a certain race, age, gender or background, but knows no ethnic, cultural or personal borders.Generally, when one type of abuse exists, it is coupled with other forms as well, they might just not be quite so noticeable unless you are aware of the types of abuse and how the belief systems associated with abusive behavior manifest themselves.

Abuse usually seems absent at the beginning of the relationship, and the majority of victims feel that they have found their perfect partner or soulmate, but gradually (it might take months or even years) the abusive behavior increases and the perpetrator is likely to use various different types of abuse:

The Function of Abuse

Domestic abuse may also be defined by identifying its function, that being the domination, punishment or control of one's partner. Abusers use physical and sexual violence, threats, money, emotional, psychological and spiritual abuse to control their partners and get their way. The different personas within the Dominator show very clearly how the different types of abuse are used to control and dominate the victim.
Sometimes Domestic Abuse is better understood by it's effect on the victim than by the specifications of the abuser. Check out the characteristics of abuse victims which give an insight into the effect that ongoing abuse has on them.

Who are the Abusers?

Who are the domestic violence abusers? What makes them tick? Is there any way of recognizing someone who perpetrates domestic abuse? Can a 'normal' person suddenly become abusive? Can they be helped and will they stop abusing or is it likely to just get worse? Do they suffer from mental illness or personality disorders?
After the more dramatic and publicized Domestic Abuse stories hit the headlines, one often hears comments such as "what sort of Monster would do that" or "Nobody I know would do that sort of thing!" or "son of a b****h" or "motherfucking a**hole". The assumption seems to be that all abusers walk around with a big A for 'abuser' on their forehead, are easily discernible by anyone 'normal' and always comply with the stereotypical image.

In actual fact one of the main problems encountered by victims, friends, family and various agencies dealing with the consequences of an abusive relationship, is how 'normal' the perpetrators of domestic violence seem, how unlike the image so frequently portrayed by the media. In much the same way as we have a mental image of the 'stranger' on the street we have to be wary of as children, we grow up with an image in our minds of the sort of looks, gender, class and behavior or other criteria by which we might expect to be able to recognize abusers. The basic message though is that there are no definite criteria which allow us to instantly recognize a potential perpetrator of domestic violence, though there are warning signs of an abusive personality which people obviously ignore out of love or something similar.

Most of the time we ignore our intuition. That's why we are humans and we are sensitive enough to know when something is amiss. I have been to several places and been in different occasions and i tell the one i'm closer to "i don't like him. i can feel enough bad energy oozing from him even if he tries to hide his real personality". These feelings sometimes appear due to being nervous or too sensitive which is ok to feel so and the more reason why one should be cautious. We never can tell what our mind is trying to tell us that we can't see or feel physically.